Life With LuLu – NOT IN THE CAR!

Posted: January 31, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Laughter, Life With LuLu | Tags: , , , , | 1 Comment

Favorite Pet Tricks?

Any idea why I know there is such a thing as the Western Car Wash Association? Normally I wouldn’t pay attention to stickers on the cashier booth of a car wash. I normally just roll on up – select the services I need, pay the attendant and proceed. Turns out I had some additional time on my hands Sunday morning. I had tried to schedule a spa treatment for our bundle of bulldog for Saturday but the folks at Fit N’ Furry were booked all day so we settled on Sunday. A great way to start the day, right? WRONG.

It rained all night and was still raining hard on Sunday morning after LuLu had her breakfast. Raining so hard she did not even consider going outside after her meal. See where I’m going with this? I let LuLu assume the position on her bed where she caught about 90 minutes before I had to roust her and head outside to my car which was conveniently parked at the end of the driveway so neither of us got too tremendously soaked. It really was coming down.

Picking her up is getting to be a task as well. Fortunately I still have some skills in deadlifting – picking up my drunk buddies off the floor … just kidding, but picking up a wrestling LuLu is a challenge. Up we go and into the back of the SUV where I have a rubber mat (whew!) covering the back deck.

The drive to Fit N’ Furry is a quick ten minute loop up onto 101N and then the first exit onto Lakeville. Coffee in hand, LuLu in the rear – okay things are working out nicely. What’s that? What’s that smell? Oooh LuLu – no farting in the car!! I roll the windows down and continue but the smell gets worse – MUCH WORSE and that’s when I started to converse with my bulldog. “LuLu – did you crap in the car? Seriously – did you dump back there?” My mind is now racing a lot faster than the posted speed limit and I can’t see her as she’s decided to duck down behind the back seats. Oh perfect. My mind is asking if she’s rolling around in it. Oh c’mon LuLu.

We arrive at Fit N’ Furry and I take my sweater off. Remember the rains? Well they’re still with us and I notice … well never mind. We’ll keep this blog G rated, but suffice it to say I’ve got some cleaning to do as well as LuLu. Into the spa we walk where she is guided into the back rooms and I slide the rubber mat out of the SUV and toss her gifts into the shrubbery.

Man I hope the car wash is open on Sunday. This is where I get to recognize the Western Car Wash Association credentials.

“Do you remove dog excrement?”

Life with LuLu continues …

Peace,

Paul

© P.E. Cheney and Life With LuLu, 2010-2011

Letter to My Humans

Posted: January 25, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Laughter, Life With LuLu | Tags: , , , , | 2 Comments

Dear Humans:

A quick note to all of you.  Hope you don’t mind I’ve installed a wireless printer while you were out today – it’s out in the garage with all the other computer peripherals you haven’t unpacked yet.  The printer comes in handy when I want to create a flyer to meet new dogs in the neighborhood, that kind of thing.

Anyway, I’d be remiss if I didn’t start things off by saying thank you for everything since the adoption.  I know the first couple of days were difficult for me – a tinkle here, a tinkle there … but you guys were all cool about it.  I figured the brown rug was going to be my “safety zone” but all of you were too fast to find it.  Good for you.

Secondly – a big thank you to Logan for cleaning up the back yard.  It was touch and go out there for a while.  My old sniffer is not what it used to be so if I end up stepping in something and then tracking it back into the house – well you know – what is it you humans say? “My bad?”  Thank you Logan for regularly cleaning up after me.

I love the new bed.  Seriously didn’t think I was going to and you tossed my old bed right into the recycling bin WHILE I WAS RIGHT THERE IN THE GARAGE.  Kudos.  Some things take time and the new monogrammed bed, well, what can a dog say but “hell yes” … and it’s regularly laundered as well.  Again – thanks.

You all may have noticed my blast zone infractions have reduced in number.  I think it’s the new dog food you purchased.  First let me say – it’s quite tasty, you know I’ll eat anything – EXCEPT FRUIT – so the new dog food is very tasty. 

Sorry for eating my poop and that whole ordeal a week or so ago – I can’t make any promises but if it means eating pineapple again then we’ve got a deal.

Understand we’re making a road trip back to Sacramento for a dog show event in February.  I’ve heard the whispers – and you know us dogs can talk all day while you’re out … if you can – run me over to Fit n’ Furry beforehand so I can look nice for Cookie and all the other dogs I’ll be meeting that day.

Other than that – hope the house looks the way you left it this morning.  Appreciate leaving KJZY on the FM radio while you’re gone … the male visitors I have over really enjoy the slow jazz music.

What’s for dinner?

Love,

LuLu

Life With LuLu – Poop Mouth

Posted: January 19, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Laughter, Life With LuLu | Tags: , | 3 Comments

It's not a meal LuLu!!

There was a movie in 2004 known as Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.  This movie was an instant classic starring none other than the current funny man, writer, director and impressionist Mr. Will Ferrell.  My kids and I have seen that movie together a number of times and we’ve traded the famous and infamous quotes back and forth … and only recently has LuLu become involved, at least indirectly, in one of the quotes from this movie after Ron Burgundy tells the entire city of San Diego, CA to “f” themselves …  that goes like this:

Garth Holliday: [sobbing incoherently] Coming out with stink like that poop, you poop-mouth, there’s poop coming out of your mouth.
Ron Burgundy: Garth, if I were to give you some money from out of my wallet, would that help ease the pain? [glances at Ed for approval]

How does LuLu fit in here?

Glad you ask.  Recently – over this past weekend she has taken up the habit of eating, yes eating her own poo.  Fortunately Logan caught her in the act from the back porch and since Logan was so animated there was no way in the world we could allow LuLu back into the house without having her mouth washed out – thank you Logan.

I brought up this little LuLu factoid at work today at lunch and a young colleague was nice enough to offer up a solution!!  Place some pineapple chunks in her food bowl – and once she recycles that – the enzymes in pineapple make her poo just too nasty to consider. 

For everything there is a reason.  Thank you to the pineapple.

Details to follow!!

When in Rome.

Peace,

Papa

© P.E. Cheney and Life With LuLu, 2010-2011